Detoxing my body and mind ✨

I am going to be real open about something I've hardly spoken about. I have anxiety and depression, PTSD and a bunch of other label's that doctors have given me. I was in a deep hole after my son was born and I was ashamed to ask for help. About a year ago I finally went on medication. I saw a psychiatrist and told her my past in detail and said that I can't be trusted with the good shit like Xanax and adivan. I can tell you with much certainty that I would snort a whole bottle in two days and destroy my life. So she prescribed me cymbalta and hydroxyzine and then later on added gabapentin. Well I think it did a great job of making me numb out and just go through the days but not truly living.
A few weeks ago I stopped taking hydroxyzine and I cut my gabapentin dose in half. Yes my doctor said that was fine. My main goal is to get off of everything.
Downside. Reducing gabapentin has made me feel like I am slowly going through heroin withdrawal. Seriously. What the hell. I'm sweaty, cold, and irritable. I'm detoxing my body and mind. Eating whole food plant based diet, moving my body, getting in tune with myself. CBD oil has helped tremendously also. I just want to rid myself of anything that makes me numb out. I want to live, really live.