Addicts are weird funny people 👽

My favorite thing to do is to make jokes about addiction with someone who isn't an addict. They look at you with horror when you laugh hysterically by yourself.

It was about noon on a hot August day like today roughly four years ago. I had recently met up with my dealer and promptly went to the closest parking spot to shoot up. I was driving back home to my grandma's house in the Ford explorer my grandparents were letting me drive. The next thing I knew I smashed into the back of a huge SUV. Airbag out and my chest hurting, I tried to find my phone. Now this poor wonderful guy who I hit comes running over to me and asked if I was okay. Saying he needed to call the police. I, with mumbled speech and eyes half open, insisted that he call my grandma instead. I can only imagine what this guy was thinking when he watched me jump out of my car and run a block to the gas station with a brown paper bag and run back empty handed. I had to hide my paraphernalia before the cops came. I was a smart little addict sometimes. 

My grandma showed up. I was sitting on a curb on the side of the road chain smoking, unable to breathe with a cracked rib. I remember telling her I refused to go to jail and that I was going to tell the cops my sisters name. She didn't like that idea. I had three warrants out, just ran from rehab, and was a goddamn mess. Long story short, the cop knew what was up with me. Told me to get my ass back in treatment or he'd come arrest me. As soon as he left I ran right back to the gas station, jumped in the dumpster behind the building and grabbed my bag of syringes and drugs. Then I went to the hospital. 

That story makes me laugh every time I think about it. The chaos. The craziness that consumed my days. The poor nice gentleman I hit that was just concerned about my well being. I can't look at the dark side of that time any longer. I know I affected many people that day and I put lives in danger. However, nobody got hurt and I don't drive half alive anymore.